1.04.2005

On this Page

» Random Quotes
» Need a good laugh?
» Q&A: Is planning really necessary?
» RANT: One-minute thoughts on projects
» Overheard on the bus
» TIP: Perform more edits in less time
» RANT: Illusions at work
» Overheard in the trench
» Overheard on the bus
» Overheard in the trench

Random Quotes

  • The elevator to success is out of order. You'll have to use the stairs... one step at a time." - Joe Girard
  • I gave my wife a new watch for her birthday . . . waterproof, shockproof, unbreakable and anti-magnetic. Absolutely nothing could happen to it. She lost it. - Joey Adams
  • One should forgive one's enemies, but not before they are hanged.
  • Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.
  • I learned the value of hard work by working hard.
  • Life in the twentieth century is like a parachute jump: you have to get it right the first time.
  • The enemy you know is not as bad as the enemy you don't know - Russian proverb

Category: C++ Quant > Random Walk

Your Turn!

 

Need a good laugh?

  • A linguistics professor was lecturing to his class one day. "In English," he said, "A double negative forms a positive. In some languages, though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative." A voice from the back of the room piped up, "Yeah, right."
  • I was getting into my car when I noticed a dent. On the windshield was a note and a phone number from the driver. "I feel terrible," the woman apologized when I called. "I hit your car as I was pulling into the next parking spot." "Please, don't worry," I said to her. "I'm sure our insurance companies will take care of everything." "Thank you for your understanding," she said. "You're so much nicer than the man I hit on the way out."
  • For the first time, my four-year-old daughter Kelsey was coming to my office to have me, a dental hygienist, clean her teeth. She was accompanied by her grandmother. When they came in, I greeted them warmly, seated Kelsey and, as usual, put on my gloves, goggles and mask. About ten minutes into the procedure, she got scared and cried, "I want my mommy!" I quickly pulled off my mask and said, "I am your mommy." Without hesitating, my daughter yelled back, "Then I want my granny!"
  • I am five feet, three inches tall and pleasingly plump. After I had a minor accident, my mother accompanied me to the emergency room. The triage nurse asked for my height and weight, and I blurted out, "Five-foot-eight and 125 pounds." While the nurse pondered this information, my mother leaned over to me. "Sweetheart," she gently chided, "this is not the Internet."

Category: C++ Quant > Random Walk

Your Turn!

 

Q&A: Is planning really necessary?

  • If you fail to plan you are planning to fail.
  • The sooner you begin coding the later you finish.
  • If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there.
  • The nice thing about not planning is that failure comes as a complete surprise rather than being preceded by a period of worry and depression.

Category: C++ Quant > Random Walk

Your Turn!

 

RANT: One-minute thoughts on projects

  • How successful is enough?: A colleague of mine asked that question and I said "successful enough not to waste time" (on firefighting, endless relationship building, or simply standing still due to bad scheduling).
  • Hard times are sometimes the best times: I'd rather deliver projects with a big budget. But the truth is that a lot of times it forces you to focus when things are tighter. It forces you to eliminate things you probably shouldn't be doing. Some of my developers used to be so preoccupied with whether or not they could, now they stop to think if they should. I don't wish for these times, but it isn't all a bad experience.
  • Sometimes I think a failing project left us with more derelict minds than derelict applications.

Category: C++ Quant > Random Walk

Your Turn!

 

Overheard on the bus

  • Sometimes don't you wish work is just like a keyboard? Then you can always keep one finger on the escape key, and press it when the sitiuation calls for it.
  • He needs a job where immense ego seems normal.
  • When virtual reality gets cheaper than dating, society is doomed...
  • You can't break him if he doesn't have a spine .
  • He asked "Are you firing me?", I said, "No, I'm not. You fired yourself with your performance."

Category: C++ Quant > Random Walk

Your Turn!

 

TIP: Perform more edits in less time

Editing lots of data can be difficult in Excel when if you find yourself constantly reaching for the mouse. This is when keyboard shortcuts come in handy
  • F2: edit in place. Now one can edit hyperlinks with ease (clicking on a cell with a hyperlink automatically opens an Internet browser window.)
  • Ctrl-*: select the entire range of cells you're working on.
  • Ctrl-+: insert cells.
  • Ctrl--: delete cells.
  • Ctrl-1: bring up format cells dialog.
  • Ctrl-Tab: move between open workbooks.
  • Ctrl-PageUp/PageDown: move between worksheets.

Category: C++ Quant > Financial Technologies

Your Turn!

 

RANT: Illusions at work

  • The illusion of taking charge: All too often, "proactiveness" is reactiveness in disguise. If we simply become more aggressive fighting the "enemy out there," we are reacting --regardless of what we call it. True proactiveness comes form seeing how we contribute to our own problems. It is a product of our way of thinking, not our emotional state.
  • What I have shown you is illusion. What you remember, that is the reality.
  • Tradition is the illusion of permanence.
  • The greatest thing the devil ever pulled was to convince the world he didn't exist... and then just like that..... he was gone

Category: C++ Quant > Random Walk

Your Turn!

 

Overheard in the trench

You know what the great thing about complaining is? It's that you can stop complaining!

John: You're listening to me, but you're not understanding me.
Jack: No, I'm disagreeing with you. That doesn't mean I'm not listening to you or understanding what you're saying - I'm doing all three at the same time.

John: Jack, Sam wants you to write a note on ...
Jack: Sam wants me?
John: Yeah.
Jack: Sam wants me to write a note on ...?
John: Sam needs it by end of day.
Jack: Are you sure he doesn't want someone who, you know, isn't staggeringly overqualified for the job?

Category: C++ Quant > Fix the Job You Got

Your Turn!

 

Overheard on the bus

  • The writing on the wall couldn't be clearer: IT is the new manufacturing. Every year, there will be fewer and fewer people employed in IT, even as IT production continues to rise.
  • I once went to an interview where the first thing the employer (not the owner) said was "Well I'm not paying you that!' He didn't introduce himself or greet me. So my response was "It's ok, I'm just shopping'. ... Yes it is smackdown tactics but he drew first blood.
  • Nobody gets on American Idol for the purpose of winning. That's just the icing on the cake. The reason people get on it is for the publicity. Whether they win or lose, just being on the show is publicity and promotion you cannot otherwise get.
  • I had an opportunity come up elsewhere that I wasn't really pursuing, but it turned out to be very interesting and they blew me away with an offer...
  • Doesn't online resume submission make you feel like a needle in a haystack? A row in a database, to be more exact. Could it possibly be the wave of the future?

Category: C++ Quant > Random Walk

Your Turn!

 

Overheard in the trench

I don't let anyone talk to me the way you just did - not my staff, not my boss, no one - certainly not you.

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.

John: may the best programmer finishes first.
Jack: I plan to.

John: Eric is back from his vacation in Florida.
Jack: I'm surprise that there are no sharks in Florida.

Timeline? This is no time to talk about time. We don't have the time!

How did the project become so late so soon?

Category: C++ Quant > Fix the Job You Got

Your Turn!